#166 Is Atma the doer or the non-doer?

Once upon a time there was a wave in the Atlantic Ocean. Trained at understanding the ways of the mind in his role as a psychologist, he was still sad. He had worked on his core issues and increased his sense of self-acceptance. Still the common theme that dominated his short life was ‘I am not enough’. He was curious about the teachings of Advaita Vedanta, non-duality as the teachings felt true. Still there was much confusion. Ambling along the Atlantic ocean, he heard that an Indian wave was visiting. Small in size, she looked happy and was surrounded by other waves who also looked happy and content. The Indian wave was taking questions

The Atlantic wave was curious –How come all of you look genuinely happy and content? Are you on Ayahuasca or did you have a mystical experience? Despite all my training in the humanities, I feel I am not enough. The irony of my life is that I help others find fulfilment in their career, relationships and health. But despite having it all, I feel that my life is incomplete. There is something wrong with me.    

The Indian wave smiled compassionately and said  – You are complete in and of yourself and everything is right with you. This is the light of Vedanta

What do you mean? Is this an affirmation I must practice – I am complete. I am complete. I am complete.

The Indian wave said – Purnatvam, completeness is your reality, which never changes. All the problems you speak of are at the level of your form and your thoughts.

Mr Atlantic wave, what defines you always is. It cannot change.

Without you the ocean cannot exist.

The Atlantic wave said – Are you making fun of me? Here I am suffering and you are telling me that the ocean cannot exist with me, a puny wave.

Yes. Water is your defining reality. Stop being obsessed about your form as the wave.

The absolute reality that you are, satyam is water. Shift your attention to who you always are – that is water.

The Atlantic wave had a flash of insight – Yes. I can see what you are saying – If I shift my attention to the fact that I am wave made up of water then life does not feel that bad.

The Indian wave then asked? Are there two things – wave and water. As the wave are you sitting on top of the water or are you under the water? Sounds ridiculous, right. There are no two things – wave and water – only water.

Does your wave form define you? No. Why? Because your form grows bigger or smaller depending on ocean and wind currents. As water, you always are.

Does your mind define you? No. Why? Because your thoughts are always changing – sometimes happy, angry, excited, fearful, sad and so on. You are present as water in between your thoughts.  

Does your experience define you? No. Why? Because your experiences change all the time whether you are hanging out with the dolphins or watching the cruise liner pass through. As water you are present in all your experiences.

Do your achievements define you? No. Why? Because you have managed to hold your own during the tsunami and even as the temperature of the ocean is increasing. 

Then what defines you? You cannot say nothing because everything becomes evident to you, you are self-evident as water.

Since water is your only reality, you are the only constant, paramarthika satyam, absolute reality.

And so as water or Atma, I is never the doer of actions, never was the doer and never will be the doer.

Because you focus on your form as a wave with a limited form, there are actions you perform. You define yourself narrowly and struggle with the self-judgement especially the theme of ‘I am not enough’, no matter what you do.

The Atlantic wave said – this is confusing. You are saying that I am not the doer..but I have travelled the world, survived two marriages and have five wonderful children. It has been an action packed life for sure.  

The Indian wave said – yes, you only heard one part of the equation. Atma, I is not the doer but the doer is the Atma. 

Simply put, Water is not the wave but the wave is water.

If I say water is not the wave, then you will ask me – but how do I account for my form? Why did bad things happen to me and why did good things happen to bad people?

If you only focus on one part of the equation, I am not the doer, you will stop doing karma. You might become indifferent and not perform your responsibilities. But as long as any being is alive, one cannot escape doing some action for the sake of the journey of the body.

Then, what might be the norms of action? As the wave form you are governed by the laws of the ocean. The ocean is Ishvara and we are grateful to its laws that bless us every moment.

When you have to function in the ocean you follow the Dharma of the ocean, the universal framework of values of kindness, justice and truth.   The intelligence and material of the entire ocean pervade you as the wave. This includes the laws of karma. The reality of the vast ocean is water.

 As the wave you have the freedom of choice to perform karma. If you perform helping actions then you get punya. If your actions are harmful you get paapa. The results of punya and paapa, invisible good and not so good results get converted to experiences of happiness and sorrow. The laws of karma apply only to the wave form never to water. And so in this lifetime maybe there is some suffering but it is only for the body and mind – that you are aware of.

Atma is not the doer or experiencer but the doer/experiencer is the Atma. The reality experienced by the wave is called vyaavaharika satyam, functional reality. There are no two categories of reality. Functional reality exists because it is pervaded by absolute reality. Wave exists because its very existence is water. What makes any of your actions and relationships possible is the fact that you exist as water. However, water can take any form or need not take a form and hence can never be affected by all the achievements or failures of the wave.

Does water which is the basis of the wave, the wavelet, the surf and the tsunami need approval  from some of the waves lapping around?   

Is water a part of you? No. All of you is water.

Is water a property that you have which may be more sometimes and less the other times?

No. All of you is water.

Will you become water as a result of meditation or chanting mantras? No you will always be water.

If your identity is of a limited wave, you will always struggle against your experiences of limitation. You want more and better and faster

But if you shift your attention to reality, water is non dual. There can never be two. Pure being is all that you are. You have no limits and no lack – As fullness, no wave can take away from you or add anything to you.

In fact you are so free that you don’t mind being a wave any more and can enjoy the glory of being a wave and all that you can do in that form. 

And so, my dear Atlantic wave, you can happily go through life, in the form of a wave, knowing that in reality you are water.  As the wave you play by the rules of the ocean which is dharma.

In any case, the reality of both you and the ocean is water. This is the great revealing equation – Tat tvam asi. That you are.

The Atlantic wave could not take the smile off his face. I see what you say

Water is not the wave but the wave is water

Atma is not the doer but the doer is Atma.

How can I abide in this?

The Indian wave said – This pursuit is of discovering the Atma, the limitless being and hence you can learn systematically with a guru in the living tradition of Advaita Vedanta.