#300 You are the Whole

You are the whole. We understand that there is no possibility of anyone becoming happy if one has to fulfill desires in order to be happy. We also understand that in spite of one’s desires, wants, and struggles, one does see oneself as full and complete in moments of joy. We must see the implications of that moment. We generally gloss over the implications. That is our problem. People say that we learn from experience. I wish we did. We hardly learn unless our attention is turned to the implications.

We will always assume a stance. The stance of a ninja. A ninja is a mythological fighter or perhaps he was a fighter once. He has hundreds of weapons. He has swords, a bunch of discs that he knows how to throw, and if that is exhausted, then he has a bunch of nails that he can use. He has smoke bombs, ropes, and so on. He can jump all over. He can even do karate.

A ninja fighter is one who does not give up. If you think that he is dead, as you walk away, he gets up. He is a “never say die” person. Every human being has this stance against the world. If you know some astrology, then you take a stance against the stars and planets. You think that they all conspire against you. The fear, the sense of being persecuted by every force, every person, and every bug makes you assume the stance of a fighter.

A moment of happiness implies you are the whole.

The implication of a moment of happiness is this, the very world to which you are alive that is full of snares and threatening situations, seems to be perfect. The moment you have a complaint against the world, you can no longer be happy. Your happiness is edited and abridged to the extent of the complaint, the severity of the complaint. It is like the laughter of a man or a woman who does not accept the alignment or the color or the number or the size of his or her teeth. Such a person cannot laugh with the mouth open totally, but laughs with tightly closed lips. It is a complex. If you do not like your teeth, do something about them. You can have false teeth. 

These days, you can always have a thing without the thing being there. You can have coffee without coffee or milk without milk. You can walk without walking, row without rowing, cycle without cycling, without moving anywhere. You can have hair without hair. You can have hair of any color without that color. You can have teeth without teeth exactly as you want. When you laugh tight lipped, there is a smile inside. But your complex of not wanting to show your teeth inhibits it.

When you burst out laughing at a joke or whatever, at that moment, you find the world is totally acceptable. Your teeth are acceptable. Your height is acceptable, and more importantly, your weight is acceptable. Everything that you complain about is now acceptable to you, which means that you see yourself as totally acceptable and one who cannot be bettered. It reveals a wholeness about you that is not opposed to the world. You do not shy away from the world. If you are afraid of the world, you have a perennial problem since the world is there wherever you go.

Once, a swami came to Rishikesh all the way from Kanyakumari wanting a quiet place for meditation. I suggested a hut near the place where I was staying, but he chose a place beyond Rishikesh called Brahmapuri. It was a nice place at the banks of Ganga with facilities for bhiksha, food, in a temple nearby. There was nothing else around except trees. He had a very quiet life. 

After a month, he came to me and said he wanted to go to Uttarkashi. When I asked him, why do you want to shift from Brahmapuri? He said, Swaminiji, this place is noisy. How? Nobody is there. Oh, Swaminiji, there are too many birds. All around me, there are birds. In the morning, I cannot meditate because they go on making noise. 

I discouraged him from going to Uttarkashi as the place would be very cold during November. Nevertheless, he went and afterwards, he never came back to Rishikesh. I made inquiries and learned that within fifteen days, he had gone back to Kanyakumari. At least he was enlightened. The enlightenment is that wherever you go, the world is with you. The problem is not the world, the problem is you.

The problem is not the world, the problem is you.

Lord Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita gives us a wonderful teaching. He says, keep all the external sense objects external. What an advice and teaching! The sense objects that include everything that disturb you, every being that bothers you from a mosquito onwards are already external. Then why should you keep them external? It is like saying “keep the car outside” when it is already outside. 

One can accomplish only something that is possible. Suppose there is a mandate, “do not drink fire or molten iron.” Such a mandate is not valid because nobody drinks fire or molten iron when one is thirsty. If, however, “do not drink alcohol” is a mandate, it can be followed because it is possible to drink alcohol. You can’t prohibit someone from doing something only when there is such a possibility. Therefore, when all the objects are external, why should Lord Krishna ask us to keep them external? This is because some of them are not merely external but are also internal.

Anybody who bothers you is not only outside but inside also. Even if the person is out of sight, he is still inside because we carry a lot of load inside. To unload the people and to allow them to be what they are definitely takes a certain understanding, a certain know how. Most of the people are those who have hurt you at one time or the other, in one manner or the other. They become the objects of your frustration. 

In other words, you have an agenda for them. Your agenda for the other may be very noble, very reasonable and proper, but the other person also has an agenda for you. The main item in his list is, please drop your agenda for me. Therefore, everyone has an agenda for the other because people are not acceptable as they are. Consequently, you do not meet the person as he or she is. He or she is always a futuristic person in your thinking. That is, he should be this or he should be that to be acceptable.

In spite of all this, I want you to understand that the implication of a moment of happiness is that the people inside your mind are kept outside. You find that all your frustrations get resolved. This is called wholeness. The wholeness includes both the subject and the object. The wholeness or completeness is not against the world. It includes the world. The very world that you complain about is the world that does not pose a threat to you. You are the subject, the experiencer, and the object that is experienced. 

When you are the experiencer of your favorite melody in music and you are happy listening to it. The object, the music that you experience, is able to completely swallow, devour all your complaints. In fact, it swallows the memory-based you, the wanting you. What remains is the objective you, the appreciative you. The subject you and the object, the music become one. This is what we call wholeness, the Drik subject and the Drishya object form one whole.

This wholeness or completeness is never lost. It is a reality. It cannot be completely relegated to the background just because you think in a particular way. The thinking itself is suspended. Your will is suspended. Your notion about yourself is suspended. In sleep, you do suspend them. In a moment of happiness also, you suspend them. This is a great blessing we have. 

People look for Bhagavan’s blessings. The greatest blessing, I say, is that you can suspend all your thinking, all your notions for the time being. Otherwise, it is not possible for anyone to be alive. Lord Krishna says that forgetting, dropping all your ideas is the key to learning. That is how we learn. You may have well entrenched ideas. You may have emotionally invested a lot in certain conclusions about people and their opinions, about gurus, etcetera. 

Later, you do not want to give up those ideas, including those ideas that we can give up in the wake of understanding. For the understanding to take place, we should be able to keep all our ideas suspended for the time being and be alive to what we read or listen to now. That capacity is a basis for all learning. We have been given that capacity. That is the reason why if there is anything striking or inspiring, it devours the memory-based you, the wanting you completely, and you find there is wholeness.

Happiness is your nature.

Our Shastra says that the wholeness or completeness is exactly what you are. There should not be, need not be, any reason whatsoever for you to be happy. You are happy without any reason, which means you are Umatta, abnormal. 

There are two types of people who are considered abnormal. People who are depressed or hilarious all the time, and people who are wise. The hilarious one will stand in the middle of the road and suddenly laugh. You do not know the reason for his laughter, for he lives in his own world. A wise person has a semblance to the hilarious person. In fact, a wise person sees something within and he laughs. But, externally, there is no reason. 

A sugar crystal is sweet because it cannot be otherwise. Whereas there is a reason if the water inside the pot is hot. There you can ask a question and get an answer. Why is the water hot? Because the pot is hot. Why is the pot hot? Because the pot is sitting on a hot plate. Why is the plate hot? Because it is sitting on fire. Why is the fire hot? But there is no cold fire. There can be a scientific answer for the heat in the fire, but that does not change the fact that fire is hot.

Similarly, one is happy for no reason. There is no answer to the question, why is a wise person happy? Being happy is not a matter of complaint for anyone. And that is why when somebody is happy, you do not sympathize with that person and inquire why you of all people should be happy. You are such a great benefactor and a good person, and therefore, you should not be happy at all. Nor does anyone come to me and complain. Swaminiji, I do not know what is happening to me these days. I’m very happy.

Sometimes when you are very happy, you become apprehensive that something untoward is going to happen. Otherwise, nobody complains about being happy and nobody enjoys being unhappy either. So the unhappy person is always consoled and sympathized with because that is not natural to him or her. What is natural is not a matter for complaint.

You do not go to an ophthalmologist and ask him, “Doctor, please do something for me.”
“What?”
“My eyes see.” 

The doctor, a kind man and patient to this patient, asked, “Oh, do they see two where there is one”?
“No. No. I see one as one and two as two.”
“Oh, are you not able to see objects very near?”
“No, doctor. I can see. I can read.”
“Oh, are you not able to see things far away?”
“No. I can see and read things far away too.”
“Oh, are you not able to see in the evening?”
“No, doctor. I see very well in the evening.”
“Oh, then are you not able to see colors?”
“No. I can see all the colors. I see you’re wearing a blue shirt.”
“Then what is your problem?”
“I told you, doctor, in the beginning itself, my problem is that my eyes see.”

The doctor said, “I see.”
Being a kind person, he recommended that the person consult a specialist on the floor above.

Eyes are supposed to see. Ears are supposed to hear. You cannot say I ate in the morning and I am hungry again. I eat and I become hungry again. Therefore, there is something wrong with my stomach. Everything is alright with your stomach. If you are not hungry at all or always hungry, then that is a problem. Somebody complains, “Swaminiji, I have too many desires.” It means you are healthy.

Your problem is not in having many desires. You do not know how to manage them. That is the problem. It is a management of riches. We do not know how to manage our riches. So what is natural is not a matter of a complaint. That you do not complain about being happy itself shows that it is natural for you to be happy. If it is natural to be happy, then why are you unhappy? It is very clear that you have a distorted view of yourself. The truth about you is totally different.

The I is unique. There is no one like you.

The I is unique. There is no one like you. Not only is no one like you, there is nothing like you. First, let us understand the implications of this statement. In English, like in other languages, you have pronouns such as he, she, it, they, and so on. A pronoun can stand for any noun, including a dog. One can use the word “it” for any neuter object and for any number of objects.

The pronouns he, she, and you can refer to people, and the pronoun “it” can refer to things. I also is a pronoun. However, how many people are there for whom? You can use I. There is only one. There is no second I in the world. Do you know why? It is because there is only one I and everything else is an object of that I. One is I and everything else is what becomes evident to that I. There is nothing similar to this I. It is just amazing. All your complexes are born of comparison. You compare yourself with a similar and you develop a complex. You can never compare yourself with the unlike and then develop a complex.

Suppose there is a great western classical musician. He’s jealous of a particular rock star because when this rock star performs, his concert attracts millions. But when the classical musician gives a concert, there are hardly twenty five people, generally old, but who can understand his music. This makes the classical musician angry and jealous.

The same classical musician will not sit by the wayside rock and lament, “Oh, rock. You are at peace with yourself whether it is sun or rain. You do not care whether somebody sits on you or spits on you. You are so at home. Whereas at home, I am not at home, neither am I at home outside. In fact, I’m not at home with myself. I am jealous of you, oh rock.” He is, however, jealous of the rock star. Do you know why? A complex is always born of comparison, comparison with the like. There is no other person, significant or insignificant from the standpoint of I. The I is unique. Everything else is evident to the I.

Our Shastra tells us very clearly that there are two facts one has to recognize. One is I, Atma, the seer, and the other is not I, Anatma, the seen. There is no third factor.

One may ask, what about heaven? Either heaven is you or it is not you. If heaven is you, then you have to understand what that heaven is. If it is not you, then definitely it is other than you. It comes under not I. Then what about God? If God is I, then he is five feet nine inches. If God is other than I, he also comes under not I. Is God I then? What is the implication? Maybe God is both I and not I. Maybe everything is God. That is a possibility. It is very clear that I am the subject and everything else is the object. This means that you cannot compare yourself with anybody. Therefore, when you say that a person is successful, it is a statement that reveals a judgment.

People are judgmental. Those who are judgmental, I say, are mental. We even make God judgmental. People say that after death, there is a judgment day. God will ask who you are and send you to hell if he does not approve of your name. He will choose those who will go to heaven. God is made into a judgmental person. I thought that God, at least, is free from being judgmental and is someone in whom I can seek refuge, someone who in his wisdom can accommodate me. He can look at my background and then say, it is because of a background that you are like this. In fact, you are as good as anyone else. At least that’s what he’s supposed to say. Every therapist is able to say that we do not need a judgmental God.

There is nothing wrong in one’s concept of God. One is free to have and practice his or her set of beliefs. However, one cannot go about converting another person. This is violence because the aggressive religion thinks there is a rich harvest for conversion available, and therefore, it has to plant the cross in Asia.

Are you a crop to be harvested? A harvest means a wholesale harvesting by conversion. In spite of this person committing the sin of calling you a sinner, there is no sinner in the vision of our Shastra. This is India and her culture. We have to be aware of our riches, our culture. In spite of these onslaughts, India still survives. We survive in spite of the politicians, in spite of our callous attitude towards our tradition, our culture, our religion, and our spirituality.

“I” is self evident awareness. Our Shastra says that you are unlike everything else. Everything in this world is evident to you. You see a flower in the garden, it is evident to you. A thing exists because it comes to your knowledge through a means of knowledge.

The sun, the moon, and the stars are because they are evident to you. Black holes are, they are evident to you through inference. That he is or she is is evident to you. Your body is, it is evident to you. Your eyes see, It is evident to you. They do not see. It is also evident to you. You have this particular thought at this moment. It is evident to you. You have in your memory your experience of Delhi, that is evident to you. That it is not in your memory is also evident to you. What you know, the knowledge is evident to you. What you do not know, the ignorance is evident to you. Everything becomes evident to you. “You” also means “I.”

Now I will ask a question. Do you exist or not? What will you say? You cannot say that you will consult someone and let me know. When you say I am, it means I exist. The am is a verb of being. “I am” means “I” is. To whom is “I am” evident? If everything is evident to you, then are you not there? Yes. I am.

To whom is the existence of the self evident? The self is evident to the self. In other words, you are self-evident. Everything else is evident to you, and therefore, you are unlike everything else. Everything becomes evident to you no matter what exists, how far it exists, how great it is, how big it is.

In Sanskrit, there are these two words, “bhati” meaning “shines” and “anubhati,” meaning “shines after.” We have to know these two words very well. “Anu” is a prefix whose literal meaning is after. When you say that a thing exists, it exists because you happen to know it. The objects in the world do not have a capacity to reveal themselves without your knowing them through the appropriate means of knowledge.

You have eyes that are capable of sight. Your eyes cannot perceive anything without picking up the light. Sight is always in terms of picking up the light. You see your physical body, it does not shine on its own, it is lighted up. Therefore, the physical body shines after whereas the light shines.

All opaque objects are not self radiant and are picked up by our eyes in terms of reflected light. The sources of light like fire, the sun, the stars, a lamp, and even a glowworm are not self luminous, but they also shine after Anubhati. How? The light in your eyes lights up the sun. It is a light of perception of awareness. The light in your eyes is the light of awareness because of which you are aware of the sun, moon, stars, and so on.

All objects, including all sources of light, shine because the eyes shine. The eyes shine because the mind behind the eyes shines. The mind shines because the eye is behind the mind. The eye shines because I am self evident, self luminous. The shine here is the light. What kind of a light? It is the light by which you see lights. It is the light because of which everything comes to light. This is you. The self-luminous you is the one to be understood. When you recognize this fact, then that is the ultimate success. When you understand the self evident you, you free yourself from being judgmental.